Postface: Personal Development is the Issue

“So let us reflect on what is truly of value in life, what gives meaning to our lives, and set our priorities on the basis of that. The purpose of our life needs to be positive. Then, our life becomes more meaningful and more peaceful, happier.”

– The 14^th Dalai Lama

In adult life, the choice of our values forms the foundation of our character, and the ability to choose our goals employs our incredible human ability to create. When both our values and goals are carefully thought through and chosen, we are equipped to move forward with more confidence and promise. The choosing of our goals also implies responsibility and action, unless a limiting belief holds us back.

We all have some experiences from the past that have wounded us mentally, physically, or emotionally, and which prevent us from moving forward and growing to new levels of success and, more importantly, new levels of awareness. This growth can be painful, as Scott Peck explains:

“Consciousness of self continues to develop throughout childhood, adolescence, and hopefully adulthood, painfully. Consciousness and pain are interwoven. If someone has severe enough physical pain, what do we do? We give him anesthesia to render him unconscious. Similarly, people will anesthetize themselves to deal with their emotional pain, either with drugs or, more commonly, through a variety of psychological tricks we call ‘defense mechanisms’.

“While sometimes necessary, even life-saving, these defense mechanisms are more often employed in an unhealthy fashion, to limit consciousness, to ward off existential legitimate suffering. When used this way, they are the cause of psycho-spiritual disease. As self-imposed limitations of consciousness, they prevent the person from moving forward through the desert of unease and becoming all that she or he can be.”⁴⁷

It is this next level of awareness which is key to achieving our goals and, more importantly, our mental and emotional states. To fulfilling our human potential and become the most that we can be is the goal of mankind.

Growth is ever-present

It is interesting that we may, in fact, sin if we do not grow. One definition of sin, from the Greek word ‘chatha’, means: “Coming short of our true end”, or “missing the mark”.⁴⁸ Even though it may be painful to grow, it is our purpose on this planet, for now at least. “No pain, no gain,” as the saying goes. Although the challenge has shifted from the struggle to survive and put food on the table to bringing purpose into our lives, a struggle is still present. The shift has gone from a physical challenge for the basic needs to a mental and psychological challenge, and perhaps ‘spiritual’ challenge.

I, for one, see the mental, psychological, and spiritual challenges as one-in-the-same, along the lines of how Scott Peck uses the term ‘psycho-spiritual’. At one point in my life, they were very different, however: My church involvement, study of theology and ministry, and serving others was my spiritual development. My personal development was never really that clearly-defined, possibly even mixed up a bit with professional development of technical skills, much of the formal schooling that equips us to fit into the corporate world, and a bit of the spiritual development that seemed to work purely on the human side. Now, I am a four-square believer in personal development being spiritual and the underlining purpose of our lives. After articulating my perspective on success in business, relationships, and personal success, my perspective on life’s purpose is that it is clear that from success to salvation, personal development is the issue. I take this stand for a couple of reasons:

1. My own thinking has changed and developed.

2. The need for growth and development is ever-present.

Firstly, I have shifted much of my own personal theology to accepting the growing evidence of human evolution, the acceptance of the new cosmology that is surfacing in many of the thinkers of today. I used to accept a typical Evangelical Christian perspective that God created man, magically forming us not all that long ago (which has been a dominate right-wing Christian view, similar to Hugh Ross’s perspective that some 40-50,000 years ago, God formed man separately from all other creatures).

Secondly, in all major religions and fields of knowledge, the underlying principle is to grow in knowledge and understanding. I do not believe that any one religion or body of knowledge has the full grasp of truth or understanding, and that we must all strive to learn more, to be more open, humble, and teachable beings. As the new cosmology thinker, Diarmuid O’Murchu has said:

“A growing consciousness is surfacing in today’s world that no one field of wisdom or knowledge – not even a religious one – can point us in life’s true direction. That direction evolves within the course of evolution itself or, more accurately, co-evolves as each interdependent dimension grows to the realization of its full potential.”

That journey of becoming the most that we can be – developing our full potential – is where we will find the answers to our lives and overcome many of the problems us humans have developed in our hearts, minds, and world. All disciplines and fields of knowledge are just beginning to understand, like children growing and becoming more consciously aware of ourselves and our surroundings. Limiting this growth is only to sin – or ‘miss the mark’ – and fail to reach our true end.

Society, organizations, and even our families suppress good, healthy growth and development in an attempt to protect us when, in fact, much of the time this has the opposite affect and even limits us on our journey. We must continue to grow and fulfill our human and individual potential and not be afraid to fail or try new things. We must continually question our paradigms and realize we are only just beginning to understand, and that there is a brave new world to explore, both externally and internally. We have unlimited nature, which is a very positive thing we all can strive for: Strive to be the best that you can be, develop your uniqueness, and contribute to the world in the special way you can. That is part of the purpose of the Life Goals Planner: To help us create and design a positive, compelling future in which we see hope and find the desire and courage to strive to build.

There is nothing good about pessimism

I am greatly concerned about how the constant bombardment of negative news is affecting our minds. Many people I know watch the news before they go to bed and read the paper in the morning before they go to work. I can’t think of a more negative way to start and finish your day, except if you add coffee and a cigarette to it.

Most of what is broadcast is a negative, manipulated one-sided point of view that promotes a sense of hopelessness. I recall a quote from George Bernard Shaw: “Newspapers are unable, seemingly, to discriminate between a bicycle accident and the collapse of a civilization.” I suppose there may be some positive advantages depending on your purpose, like possibly a fear that may motivate you to do something, but I suspect that 99% that read and watch only do so for general information. In this case, I only see a negative impact feeding a pessimistic attitude.

There is nothing good about being pessimistic: It will rob your chances of success, it will steal your hope for the future, negatively impact your relationships, and add to bad health. It will only dig you a hole in the ground and bury you. We have to start to read again, but we need to read with our minds and hearts. I loved this article in the November, 2002 edition of Toastmasters magazine that challenged us to be better readers, more purposefully selective on what we read. The article titled, What does it mean to be well-read, talked about reading material that challenges our minds:

“Well-read signifies intelligent, wise, something we all would like. Most of our reading is informational reading. Newspapers, magazines, flyers, etc. which unfortunately does not require us to do much thinking. We read the mass media print like we ingest fast food which gives us little to no nutritional value. If we read with our hearts and minds disconnected, we can become highly uninformed, very ignorant people.”

Ignorance is not bliss: It is poverty, racism, misunderstanding, and arrogance. It is part of the problem in this world and something we must strive to overcome as a species, a nation, a family, and as individuals. A lot depends on your attitude and how you have been programmed, as L.P. Jacks has said:

“The pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity, the optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.”

I often wonder what it would be like if negative and bad news never did sell, and for the last 150 years all we ever heard was all the positive things about society, people, progress, and the incredible opportunities we will enjoy in the future. I would think that it would have had a tremendous impact on our overall outlook, our attitudes, and ability to deal with the challenges of the day. I enjoyed Faith Popcorn’s book, The Popcorn Report, where she describes two scenarios:

“The year is 2010. The great product of the last 10 years has been waste. Now, there is so much of it the real money is being made by the garbage barons. They make the garbage go away and get plenty of money for it and it’s not just junk, it’s toxic. Not only do we drink bottled water, but our homes are equipped with air purification systems with special filters. You can’t just hop in your car and get away from it all, for one thing, where is there to go, and the other is a tank a gas will cost you about $150. Air is so bad you can only drive 3 days a week, and different colored license plates tell you when it’s your turn to drive. The city is no longer a cultural center but a war zone. School buses carry armed guards and home security has become home defense. Everything the media warned us about has come to pass.”

And the second:

“The year is 2010, but we have learned from our mistakes and have made good decisions. We don’t simply recycle, but we replenish. Corporate America has been transformed to meet our needs in a profound way. The city is no longer a heartless void but a community of neighbors. Most of us work at home and we are closer to our families. Electronic technology has served us well, freeing time and giving us more time for leisure. Government is back to its roots and provides true service. Quality is important, not only in the things we make but in the things we do. The future is bright and people are happy.”

Which scenario do you believe to be more likely and which do you wish and hope for? I will bet most find it easier to believe in the first scenario but deep down hope for the second. I am asking you to do much more than hope for, but act upon and begin to create. Create with your human ability to do so, to set goals and make the necessary changes which I will cover in the application at the end of this chapter.

Three powerful reasons for optimism

I am a true optimist for three reasons:

1. We must engage in a positive future.

2. There is more positive than negative, which can be seen more clearly in context.

3. We have a great capacity to solve almost any problem.

Firstly, I believe we must engage in, hope for, and focus on a positive future, a positive scenario like the second, above, for the sake of our children and of all people. Without a future, people have less ability, desire, and motivation to try, to strive for good, to challenge themselves, and do the hard work of learning and discipline that are required.

As I have mentioned about Victor Frankl: He went on to talk about the inner strength one could have by pointing out a future goal and made note, “It is peculiar that man can only live by looking to the future.” And it is Friedrich Nietzsche who said, “He who has a ‘why’ to live can bear almost any ‘how’.” It is for this that we must each personally design not only a positive, but a compelling future that gives us the ability to borrow from it the power to act rightly, now. I am certain that individual and collective feelings, attitudes, and actions will fuel and fulfill the second reason I have.

Secondly, there is as much positive, if not more, than there is negative. We just don’t hear about it and don’t understand how it will eventually benefit us. We are usually caught up in the event, unable to see why or how it may help in our growth and the advancement of society and humanity. More often than not, we misinterpret the information we hear. We are heavily restricted from our personal bias and agendas. This limited information skews our perspective and we fail to see or realize that there is another side of the coin. We need to be careful about our acceptance of so-called ‘facts’, ‘statistics’, ‘studies’, ‘reports’, and the context that this information exists within.

There are always two sides to every story and context is always important, which you don’t get from one, single human being, i.e.: A book, a report, a study, or the media, who seem to be king at taking things out of context. The media always plays a balancing act with ethics. That’s their job, whether you see it as right or wrong: It’s business and a bottom-line. It is up to us to be better informed, expand our perspective, and not so easily accept everything we see or hear, even if it supports our beliefs, wants, or desires. We need to grow in awareness and challenge our beliefs to gain more understanding and make better decisions.

Now, it is time to elect the world leader, and your vote counts. Here are the ‘facts’ about the three leading candidates:

Candidate A: He associates with crooked politicians and consults with astrologists. He’s had two mistresses. He also chain smokes and drinks 8 to 10 martinis a day.

Candidate B: He was kicked out of office twice, sleeps until noon, used opium in college, and drinks a quart of whiskey every evening.

Candidate C: He is a decorated war hero. He’s a vegetarian and doesn’t smoke, but drinks an occasional beer and hasn’t had any extra-marital affairs.

Which of these candidates would be your choice?

‘Candidate A’ is Franklin D. Roosevelt

‘Candidate B’ is Winston Churchill

‘Candidate C’ is Adolph Hitler

So, you can see the importance of context, and if we put our world in context, we see that things are getting much better, as the wonderful positive book by Sir John Templeton illustrates:

Food: As recently as 1940, one farmer produced enough food for a dozen people. Now, a single worker produces enough for 80 people. This translates into the world’s population consuming 20% more than fifty years ago, with developing nations eating an average of 2,600 calories per day.

Health & Life Expectancy: 50% of all medical knowledge has been developed in the past decade. The United States spends $15.9 billion on medical research, 5,300 times the 1940 level, and the US death rate has dropped 40% in the last 2 decades.

Political Freedom: Of the world’s 192 sovereign states, fully 93% (179) of them elect their own legislators. Democracies rarely wage war against one another and political freedom is increasing dramatically around the globe.

Environment: American pollution levels are down to 1/3^rd the level they were on the first Earth Day in 1970, and recycling rose from 3% to 22% from 1988 to 1993 (5 years).

Getting along: Military spending decreased $935 billion between 1987 and 1994, and many countries spend more on health and education than on military.

Spiritual: Religious contribution is at its highest, exceeding $60 billion in the US alone, and in 1990, overall sports attendance was 388 million while religious services exceeded 5 billion.⁴⁹

The bottom line is that people are better fed, better clothed, better housed, and better educated than ever before in human history. People are becoming more aware and wanting change. Jim Wallis writes about changes at gang levels of society in his book, The Soul of Politics:

“These young gang members spoke of their need for the community to reach out to them. ‘Why now?’ he asked. ‘I don’t know, man. We just woke up. We need spiritual power.’ They’re taking responsibility. These gang leaders planned a summit meeting where they were to introduce a national truce and redirect their energies toward personal transformation and economic development.”⁵⁰

Thirdly, and most importantly, I believe that we have the ability and desire to solve any problem that we have created. Sadly, many don’t have the motivation because we don’t have big goals and well-designed futures. Most of us would agree that we can pretty much solve any problem if we take the time, spend the money, and learn the necessary skills. In fact, we humans have demonstrated time and time again, throughout history, that we have an unbelievable ability to create solutions to problems. We are great at creating problems, but we are just as good at creating solutions.

I say all of this because I believe that if we can do it personally, then collectively we can do much, much more. Through our growing pains – our growth and development – we will emerge and fulfill our human destiny. We are not running out of food, we are not running out of room on this planet, and we are beginning to wake up and deal with our major issues.

A great waking up

We are waking up to much of the mess we have created. Our awakening is as much a part of our evolving awareness as anything else. Do you think that when we had invented the first machine that we knew it would have soon become a factory, contributing to the pollution problems of our water and air? Do you think that when the first automobile came onto the scene that we had any idea of the effects of carbon dioxide on our Ozone? Of course not. It is only through our purposeful evolution, our growing and creating, and exploring of our full potential that these things happen. Therefore, there is no blame to be given, only responsibility to be taken.

It has only been in the last 30 or 40 years that we have really realized the potential of human extinction. Just the plain fact that we are aware of all the destruction we have caused demonstrates that we care about investing in the talent, time, and resources so that we can deal with these problems. Many feel that we may not be investing enough and that we must question our own contribution. If that is how you feel, then the question is put back on you: “What are you doing to contribute to the solution?”

If we don’t blow ourselves up with nuclear weapons, then extinction is a real possibility of probably 100 different scenarios. Even Diarmuid O’Murchu, after two pages on the negative side, came up with positive possibilities:

“The most optimistic scenario we can envision is one where we will somehow avert a global catastrophe, or if it does happen, somehow survive it. Our hope on averting one is heavily reliant on either our self-understanding as ‘masters of creation’ who will engineer some dramatic solution, or our self-perception of being altruistic, responsible human beings who will make drastic changes in lifestyle and behavior in the face of impending destruction.”

It is my perspective that, of course, we will engineer a dramatic solution. It probably won’t even be that dramatic, but a progressive realization of our abilities, needs, wants, and desires as loving, caring human beings. We have the desire and the ability, and we will see the results. As the Worldwatch Institute says:

“The Institute’s highly-respected interdisciplinary research team argues that past successes – such as the elimination of smallpox and the encouraging drop in birth rates in many countries – prove that humanity is capable of redirecting itself in positive ways. Most encouraging, the world is sitting on the cusp of similar successes that could usher in a sustainable human civilization. And a quickening of religious interest in humanity’s place in the natural environment could awaken a powerful new constituency to the cause of sustainability.”⁵¹

People are awakening, and the growing awareness throughout the world is huge. Millions and millions of people and many corporations, large and small, are making changes. As we gradually break through our personal and organizational limiting beliefs and become more united, people will grow to new levels of awareness and responsibility. This is our human purpose, our potential, and our gift that is sure to be manifested as we continue to evolve into the future. Diarmuid O’Murchu asks some good questions in the conclusion of his book I have been quoting:

“What to do with those awakening feelings, how to talk about them, where and with whom to explore them are among the perennial questions of our time – urgent, not just for a meaningful spirituality of the future, but indeed for the survival of civilization itself.”

He continues:

“All indications are that the wisdom provided by formal religious institutions and those who represent them is of little use in addressing these burning contemporary issues. We need new ways of befriending, supporting, and enlightening each other in this new exploration and, in due course, we’ll need new rituals to acknowledge, negotiate, and celebrate the spiritual revolution.”⁵²

The belief systems in which our religious institutions uphold may in fact be limiting and unable to answer our questions and give us the direction we need in the emerging cosmology, but the people that belong to them do have a tremendous amount of power with their prayers and collective consciousness to help move this world in the right direction.

A new Worldwatch study documents how religious and environmental groups are partnering for the planet:

“Washington, D.C.—Religious institutions around the world are going green and providing a push to the environmental movement, says a new report from the Worldwatch Institute, a Washington, D.C.-based research organization. Invoking the Spirit: Religion and Spirituality in the Quest for a Sustainable World documents how these unconventional alliances are growing in frequency and significance.”⁵³

World religion statistics

This chart is pretty close to two other sources recording world religion populations:

Religion	Date Founded	Sacred Texts	Members	% of World
Christianity	30 CE	The Bible	2,015 million	33% dropping
Islam	622 CE	Qur’an & Hadith	1,215 million	20% growing
No religion	No date	None	925 million	15%
Hinduism	1,500 BCE	The Veda	786 million	13%
Buddhism	523 BCE	The Tripitaka	362 million	6%
Atheists	No date	None	211 million	4%
Tribal Religions	Prehistory	Oral tradition	91 million	2%
Judaism	No consensus	Torah, Talmud	18 million	<1%
Sikhism	1500 CE	Guru Granth Sahib	16 million	<1%
Confucianism	520 BCE	Lun Yu	5 million	<1%
Zoroastrianism	No consensus	Avesta	0.2 million	<1%

<www.religioustolerance.org/worldrel.htm>

Most of the world’s population adheres to one religion or another. Religion is the world’s most debated subject and the least agreed-upon, which is possibly why it is so hard to find real direction.

I never did understand the battles and differences they seemed to harbor. Shortly before writing this, I took another world religion course to further my understanding and so believe at the core they are much the same, as Huston Smith, a scholar of world religions, has said:

“If we take the world’s enduring religions at their best, we discover the distilled wisdom of the human race.”

What I found is that every religion teaches ethical standards and moral values of behavior. These values and standards form the foundation of their teaching and identity for the individual and community. One of such teachings is The Golden Rule, which most faiths have in common:

• Christianity: “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” (Jesus, Luke 6:13)

• Baha’i: “Blessed are those who prefer others before themselves.” (Baha’u’ailah, Tablets of Baha’u’ailah)

• Buddhism: “Hurt not others in ways that you yourself would find hurtful.” (Udana, Varqu 5:18)

• Hinduism: “This is the sum of all duty: Treat others as you yourself would be treated.” (Mahabharata 5:1517)

• Jainism: “In happiness and suffering, in joy and grief, regard all creatures as you would regard your own self.” (Lord Mahavir, 24th Tirthankara)

• Judaism: “A certain unbeliever came to Rabbi Shammai and said: ‘Convert me provided that you teach me the entire Torah while I stand on one foot.’ Shammai drove away the inquirer with the builder’s cubit which was in his hand, and then went to Rabbi Hillel who said: ‘What is hateful to you, do not do to your neighbor. That is the entire Torah, the rest is commentary. Go and learn it.’” (Talmud, Shabbat 31a)

• Sikhism: “Be not estranged from another for God dwells in every heart.” (Sri Guru Granth Sahib)

• Zoroastrianism: “Human nature is good only when it does not do unto another whatever is not good for its own self.” (Dadistan-i-Dinik, 94:5)

I am not a theologian or a scientist to debate whether humans have been around for millions of years or formed as recent as Dr. Ross suggests. I do not believe that any particular religion has a fuller truth than another or that its participants are more enlightened than anyone else. What I do know is that a fundamental principle applies in all cases: Grow!

Become more aware and conscious creatures, and in that process we will come to our full potential and maybe, just maybe, then we can see things as they really are. It is the process of continuous improvement and, more importantly, it is the process of continual understanding.

Knowledge is the path to understanding, and becoming a more aware and more conscious human being is a process that is never-ending. The process of asking, seeking, and finding never ends, but understand that we can develop and fine-tune the way in which we go about it and become a significantly more alive person, experiencing life to its full along the way.

The Dalai Lama concluded The Art of Happiness with his vision of a truly spiritual life, with religious beliefs as one level of spirituality and the second being what he calls ‘basic spirituality’:

“The basic human qualities are goodness, kindness, compassion, and caring. Whether we are believers or not, this kind of spirituality is essential. I personally consider the second level of spirituality to be more important than the first.”

The Dalai Lama is clear that the purpose of mankind is the pursuit of happiness, and the first step to seeking happiness is learning:

“No matter what activity or practice we are pursuing, there isn’t anything that isn’t made easier through constant familiarity and training. Through training, we can change; we can transform ourselves.”

When we act with discipline, our happiness and self-esteem rise. When we fail to act with discipline, we recede and feel worse about ourselves, regardless of what religion we are a part of or what we believe.

The paradox of growth

The ‘paradox of growth’ is being content with what we have, who we are, and yet at the same time striving continuously to become the most that we can be. The great comfort is that it does not matter how much you grow or if you succeed. As Mother Teresa said:

“God doesn’t require us to succeed; he only requires that you try.”

Furthermore, we started this book with this definition of personal development:

The deliberate growth or development of a particular individual or organization to bring out their potential and capabilities, making them more aware of their inner feelings and belief systems to become a more conscious, whole, or healthy human being.

We have seen how personal development is really the key to success in all areas of life, no matter how you define it. Personal development is also the key to courage. As you personally grow, you will find more courage: More courage to live your dreams and the courage to live fully as a human being and enjoy the experiences that come from that.

We develop the courage to ask ourselves big questions that impact our attitudes that in turn affect our behaviors. We develop the courage to be okay with who we are and to accept ourselves for the things we cannot change, and this allows us to be more accepting of others and their weaknesses and indifferences. Personal development gives us the courage to choose values to live our life by, to develop character, and be true to ourselves. It gives us the ability to accept the unknown and press on when success is uncertain. I would like to complete this definition by adding the words ‘organization’ and ‘courage’:

Personal development is the deliberate growth and development of a particular individual or organization to bring out their potential and capabilities, making them more aware of their inner feelings and belief systems to become a more conscious, courageous, understanding, healthy, and loving human being.

2