Exercise 1: Life Defining Questions

Before you begin to create your lists of goals it is wise to be in a healthy and productive state of mind. What I mean by this is to be in a positive state, to be feeling good about yourself and your future. Many of you will be going through this book when life isn’t going so well, you may not be making the progress or finding purpose and meaning. We all go through stages in life where we are wondering what is next. Perhaps you have accomplished some goals or you are moving through a new stage in life like middle age. It is no accident that most people go through a crisis during this stage and that’s why we call it a mid-life crisis. Your body is going through changes and possibly many other areas changing as well. I tell you having a clear set of goals like what you are about to have can dramatically reduce if not totally eliminate a mid-life crisis.

The truth is the future is bright and we all have incredible opportunities. We all need a compelling future to live life fully. We need vision that employs our human characteristics and empowers us to overcome present difficulties and make wise choices. We need to instill hope! Hope for good things so we will try, so our children will try. Don’t leave them empty-handed. Model for them and teach them to set goals and pursue a life full of meaning and success. Sir John Templeton’s latest book Is Progress Speeding Up, subtitled “Our Multiplying Multiple Blessings” is an excellent resource of positive things taking place in our world. Optimism is a characteristic of highly successful people, pessimism of failures.

Optimists have high hopes, high expectations and clear goals to back that up and soon you will too. They understand success and they are confident they can achieve anything they desire. They also know that achieving, having discipline and a sense of accomplishment in life gives purpose and meaning. The bottom line is be as positive as you can when you brainstorm your goals. Don’t let fears, insecurities or beliefs that the world is going to blow up rob you from designing a life and growing toward success. I strongly believe that it is the purpose of mankind, to grow and become the most that we can be and it is certainly one of the best gifts you can give your children. Let them see you set and achieve goals to create character and a bright future.

Try to be as positive and objective as possible and simply answer the questions the best you can for now. Many feel that they may miss something or the answer they give is permanent. You don’t have to worry, you won’t miss anything and nothing will be set in stone. It is all part of the process of clarity. You may even want to go over some of the exercises another time before you set some goals and make some decisions. Trust in yourself, the three C’s and in the processes.

 

Life Defining Questions
1. Of all the things you have done in life, what has given you the most personal satisfaction or the greatest feeling of significance?

 

2. What would you do with your life if you won 1 million dollars? We are not talking about 100 million dollars but just one so you would still have to be wise with the money. What would you start doing, what would you stop doing? What would you do with the majority of your time?

 

3. If you knew you could not fail, what would be the ultimate activity or achievement for you?

 

4. Briefly describe what the ideal or perfect life would look like if all your biggest hopes and dreams came true.

Example:
I am the founder & CEO of a leading personal development company and just won the Ernst Young Entrepreneur of the Year Award receiving world recognition for the difference we make in the lives of people, the impact our company makes on society and the world as a whole. I would be living in a beautiful 3 bedroom house with all the accessories (written in goal categories) in West Vancouver overlooking the inlet and Stanley Park. There my beautiful wife would be home schooling our 2 children and we would enjoy deep rich communication, openly sharing all and any thoughts, struggles, fears and joys with 100% support and encouragement. We have high levels of trust, respect, understanding and commitment for one another as we continue building our dreams, achieving our goals and strive to become the most that we can be.

I would travel to the office where I would have tremendous discipline to make things happen efficiently and effectively with full support of a superb staff. I would be respected in the industry as an authority, an expert and man to model. Our family would enjoy the finest health, the finest home and furniture, the finest automobiles and work hard as a family, disciplined to do the things we ought to do, encourage, support and challenge each other to grow in love, wisdom and respect for one another and all of mankind. We would be actively involved in the community supporting men and women to grow, change and make wiser decisions to help build a better world. For a break from our well balanced life we would enjoy monthly four day weekends in local resorts nurturing our hearts, minds and souls. Annually we would enjoy world travel, experiencing different cultures and countries to bring back more ideas, experience, understanding and love.

 

5. Imagine years from now after a happy and fulfilled life like the one above, your are given the opportunity to write your own eulogy. What would you want it to say? How would you want people to remember you.

 

6.As a final question for Exercise 1 why don’t you think of what three or four people dead or alive that you truly respect and admire. Think of what it is about them you admire and list those qualities. Then consider making them part of a personal development goal.

Examples:	Characteristics:
1) Abraham Lincoln	– perseverance – integrity – ability to communicate
2) Anthony Robbins	– his excitement and enthusiasm for life
3) Mother Teresa	– compassion for others – her nonjudgmental attitude

 

People:	Characteristics:
	– –
	– –
	– –
	– –

 

Part 1 Conclusion
Remember that these questions are dynamic. You are engaged in a process that will provide more clarity and some of your ideas and thoughts are likely going to change. You may even think of things tomorrow or the next day that you will want to add or subtract from these answers. The whole idea is to engage you in the process and by the time you have worked through this planner you will have a whole new lease on life.

It is a very powerful activity to continually ask yourself these and other life defining questions. The better quality of question you ask the better quality of answer you will get. Carl Sagan once said; “We make our world significant by the courage of our questions and the depth of our answers.” Asking these kind of questions will help you to define and refine that which is most important to you.

Let your conscious and subconscious mind go to work for you and amazing things can happen. Put a date on the pages so you can keep track of when you did what. It’s always nice when you look back from your future success at the thoughts you once had.

“The person with a fixed goal, a clear picture of his desire, or an ideal always before him, causes it, through repetition, to be buried deeply in his subconscious mind and is thus enabled, thanks to its generative and sustaining power, to realize his goal in a minimum of time and with a minimum of physical effort. Just pursue the thought unceasingly. Step by step you will achieve realization, for all your faculties and powers become directed to that end”
Claude M. Bristol